How to Get Unstuck

Do you feel stuck in some area or task in your life because you have a rigid idea of how the path forward or solution should look?

Are you (slightly) ashamed of this procrastination, and judging yourself harshly?

Common thought loop:

1) There is only one way to solve my problem.

2) I don't feel like doing it.

3) Why am I so incapable? I know I should just force myself to make progress, but it is so painful that I don't even want to think about it. Tomorrow is a better day to resolve this. Or next month.

The can is kicked down the road, and there is a daunting feeling that something is slowly rotting.

Not a fun place to be.

Your main problem is that you BELIEVE there is only one way to fix this problem, and that way doesn't work for you. So, you are stuck.

Here are some ideas:

1) Get clarity.

Ask the hidden part of you that is pushing the brakes on this issue for its opinion(you can do it through journaling):

- Is it scared of changes or what will happen if you succeed?

- Are you being mean to yourself and pushing too hard?

- Is the goal too ambitious, or not concrete enough, or not specific enough?

- Is it something you are not meant to do alone and should ask for help?

- Could you be missing a much easier and more pleasant solution to the problems and instead enforcing the "My Way or Highway"?

2) Is it truly important?

- What happens to your life in 9 months if this issue is not addressed?

- What are the consequences of no action?

3) Change the energy from "boring horrible rotten drag" to "hey, that could be fun".

Brainstorm: ask your brain for the next 24 hours to generate the most ridiculous ideas to have fun with your problem and ways of solving it.

Make it fun:

You want to be able to joke about it.

To give yourself permission to run wild and FREE.

Free from preconceived idea of how you will never make progress.

Engage creativity: steal your kid's crayons and draw your feelings about it.

Make a dance on how you will solve it.

Throw a party for yourself to get started - with wine, chocolate, ice cream, etc

Write an email from yourself in a year when this problem is solved, and express gratitude for taking action.

4) Ask someone else for advice or support. Share with them that you are stuck and ask them to hold your hand while you do it.

Can't get started with updating your resume? Ask a friend to join you on Zoom while you do it.

5) Build confidence: Commit to taking daily steps that are ridiculously small.

Want to spend more time with your kids?

- Spend 5 minutes listening to them during a meal.

- Watch a funny video with them every day or read for 5 minutes your favorite book.

- Get ice cream together.

Anything to build momentum and reinforce that you are great at moving things forward.

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- Prime your brain to look for a different path forward.

- Change the mood: this is fun!

- Be open for this new idea to come.

- Commit to a small step every day.

You rock!