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Meditation for When You Are Irritated

Word of caution: when looking for a way out of frustration, make sure that your meditation practice helps you recognize and address the root of frustration instead of transcending the energy. 

Inner irritation is similar to the irritation we feel when something pricks our skin. It signals that there is a problem. A problem that should be addressed instead of avoided.

Frustration signals that

- our boundaries are being crossed

- we are tolerating something we should not.

Getting to Calm from Frustration:

1) Recognize physical symptoms of irritation: tightness in hands, chest, jaw. Faster heartbeat. Feeling restless. 

2) Acknowledge it. Say out loud or write on paper: I am very frustrated. 

3) Validate your feelings: 

- It is OK to be frustrated. 

- I am allowed to feel frustrated. 

- I have healthy boundaries that protect me. 

- I have a valid reason to feel this way. 

- Frustration is helpful as it shows me where there is an imbalance. 

4) Promise yourself a plan of action:

- I will find out what is out of balance and do my best to restore it.

- After I calm down, I will come up with a plan to take action. 

- I need to get to a steady presence of mind, and then I will fix it. 

5) Cool down "hot" frustration:

- Release it through breathing: audible exhale through the mouth. Almost pushing the air out. - Move the energy: Rub your hands, and then row air around you with your palms, as if bringing the emotions out of your body, through the hands, into the air. Slowly stomp your feet. 

- Hold breath on inhale. Take a deep inhale, and hold it for 10-15 seconds. Then release through the mouth. Repeat. 

6) Meditate on the protective energy you feel in the body that we call frustration. 

It has a fiery nature to it, so you can meditate on the element of flame. Recall your favorite experiences with fire: 

- sitting by the campfire

- making a bonfire on the beach

- lighting up a candle

- watching sunset

Use your senses. Remember the smells of burning wood, the colors of flames, the gentle sounds. 

Connect with the purifying, burning away, cleansing, transformative energy of the flames. Feel how similar energy might be running in your veins. Let it move, while holding it inside the steady embrace of your acceptance and presence.

Thank your inner fire for protecting you. 

7) Take action. Change something in your life. Out of collected and composed state. 

- Have that conversation about something that bothers you. 

- Draw firmer borders and communicate them. Tell people what is OK and what is NOT OK. 

- Come up with a plan to transition from positions and relationships that don't serve you and your future.

- Step away from relationships that don't feed your Soul or take too much from you. 

That last step is critical. No matter how good we are at calming ourselves down, if we don't take action, frustration will come back with double the force, and for a good reason.